The lack of hurry. Glancing up at the sound of giggles, feeling warm soapy water, dirty dishes in my hand, while watching a baby and toddler become friends amidst a pile of baby toys on the living room floor.
Noticing the rustling in the bushes, stopping to search for the lizard running through the leaves, pointing out the lizard to eager, excited children.
Laughing fully along with small voices to the silly song about frogs blaring from the car speakers.
Laying on the ground in the afternoon; soaking in the image of my little boy, nose to nose with his stuffed elephant, staring off into space, consumed with toddler thoughts. That elephant nose, rubbing back and forth.
The load of laundry on my hip abandoned on the couch while I kneel to tickle the baby. The sound of her giggles filling the room with happiness.
The life I want.
My mind is a lot clearer now. I am not depressed. I’m not overly stressed. Things are balanced. Within the balance are stressful moments. There are also lots of busy moments. Those don’t consume me anymore.
Oh man is life full right now. When not cleaning, cooking or homeschooling we’re outside or we’re inside playing lots of games or reading books. I love playing games and reading books! I love that my mind isn’t elsewhere, on uncompleted to dos, while being with my kids!
I don’t know if her toe walking will “stick around” like Sierra’s did. I really hope not. But I guess toe walking is genetic. I used to walk on the tops of my toes as a kid (not constantly like Sierra) and Payson does that often, too. So somewhere in my genetics I’m setting my kids up for physical therapy. Great 😛
Payson decided to rip apart a scrapbook page I had on the table. He threw a sheet of vellum on the floor. It landed near Ember. Who happily gobbled up her treat. The ink from the printed journaling made quite the mess. Where was I? Sitting right next to her oblivious until she’d chewed for a few seconds. Brooklyn was sitting a few feet away and said, “Mom, Ember has paper!”
I always bring diapers and wipes when we go places (obviously they’re needed) but I also always leave them in the car. Because I change the kids a lot in the car and am stupid and don’t put the stuff back in my diaper bag. I don’t know why I do that.
So Ember had a very full (leaked through) diaper and I had no wipes. Luckily I did have a diaper. I used my water bottle and her shorts to clean her up. So she went pantless the rest of the trip. Luckily it was hot so it worked out.
I don’t usually get an icee for myself. And I usually hate everything flavored orange. I can’t stand orange candy or soda or popsicles or anything. I was surprised when I tasted the girls’ orange cream icee by how much I loved it! I went and bought one for myself!
Payson and I were giving each other tastes. It was so fun sitting with him (the girls were at another table, which was adorable that they went and sat on their own at a little table) and sharing. He’s a very sweet little boy. He was so happy that he could have an icee 🙂
So that icee I loved? I drank four or five sips and got sick of it. haha!
And now, I really have to go get some stuff clean and then set up Payson’s preschool stuff! I’m so excited. It came in the mail this week and there are posters and a calendar that are supposed to be hung on the wall. I bought some large whiteboards to hang them up on instead. I’m sick of poking holes in my wall to have the poster ripped down by Payson anyway!