15 Weeks Old

This girl. Oh boy she has completely changed my life! I can’t imagine life without my sweet little Ember.
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There’s not been one day or (long) night since her birth where I’ve felt anything but extreme gratitude to be her mom and an overwhelming love for her. Overwhelming. I see her and I light up. I break into a huge grin and have to pick her up and cuddle her. And she cuddles right back. She leans in and pulls me tight.
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She loves to be hugged and kissed. Allan and I think it’s so special that she will sit there while we kiss her face and just relax and give these small smiles and soak it all in. You can hold her and kiss her face for pretty much as long as you want and she loves every second of it ♥
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It’s blissful enough that she is such a happy girl, smiling constantly and giggling at the most random things we all do, but to also be the world’s biggest cuddle bug and lovey baby? I love it. I love her so much!
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While I was typing this she was on my lap, on the boppy specifically, nursing and falling asleep. She finally dozed off and so I pulled my bra up and within a minute she stirs and her little mouth goes in a fishy shape as she starts sleep searching for my boob again. When she meets fabric rather than skin she opens her eyes. lol
She absolutely will not sleep without being nursed. It’s kinda… funny, really. After four kids and all kinds of sleeping habits from all of them, nothing matters that much anymore. So I’m tired and she can’t be left with anyone else… no big deal. Really I felt so helpless and desperate when Brooklyn was this age and acted the same, nursing to sleep or staying awake all day. I would panic thinking, how will I ever leave her with someone else or sleep a full night myself or, or, or…??

And now, the fourth child… it’s more like, well, she’s a baby. Babies are only babies for such a short while, I really don’t care that for these few months she wants to be attached to me all day. Let her! It comforts her, it makes her feel loved. It’s all good ♥
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9 thoughts on “15 Weeks Old

  • Thank you for that. None of mine have taken bottles ever, so I almost never leave them for over a year and night sleep has been a nightmare for nearly the first year of life too, so as I approach the due date for my fourth, I feel anxiety sneaking in about it all. Instinctively I know what you are saying, but I have to hear it and remind myself that it's all okay. It is such a short time. A short time…a short time…enjoy it all…enjoy it all…

  • She is just precious! My youngest (and last *sniff *sniff) was the same way, always needing to be held or better yet attached to me! But she's “the baby” like you said. FYI… she's still nuring and she's 18 months old…didn't see that one coming, ha!

  • I felt the exact same way with Leah. I was just so dang happy that she was nursing at all, that there was no way I was going to do anything to mess that up! She's 10 mos now, and while she still needs to nurse to sleep, she's sleeping in her own bed, and all night! So I can at least put her to bed and then go out by myself for awhile. It was hard when she's only sleep with my boob in her mouth, but I treasured every moment of it!

  • She is the CUTEST ever!! That last picture…the smile, the legs, ahhhhh she's too adorable! How wonderful that she's so cuddly and loveable! I used to love it when the babies would let me love and kiss on them! Most of them are too busy these days, but I cherish those cuddly moments we do get!

  • Is it strange to say that I could just eat Ember right up? (If so, completely disregard!) 🙂 Those pictures are adorable, but that 5th one is too stinking cute! I can see why you spend so much time cuddling and loving on her. Between your sweet baby girl, Payson's cutie-pie antics and the time you devote to your sweet older girls, it's pretty amazing that you manage to get anything done!

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